CYFSN Elizabeth Carey

Justin Barton: [00:00:00] Welcome to the Can You Feel? So now podcast and I am spoiled rotten that I get to sit down with amazing young men and young women and discuss their missions, and today is no exception. I get to sit down with someone I met just a couple of days ago for the first time, and I'm grateful that we get to record here.

Justin Barton: Her name is Elizabeth Carey and I'm just excited to sit down and get to know her a little bit better. Elizabeth, why don't you take just a minute, introduce us to yourself, a little bit about your family where you're from and maybe some hobbies that you enjoy doing.

Elizabeth Carey: I'm Elizabeth Carey. My family and I currently live in Spokane, Washington. We were a Navy family for a good chunk of years, and my dad just retired a few years ago, and so this is the retirement place for the time being. I served a mission in upstate New York. I got back home three or so months ago.

Elizabeth Carey: And currently I'm just enjoying life in college I guess for some family background, my family's large-ish, I guess depends on perspective. There's seven kids in my family and it was my older sister [00:01:00] and her example of going on a mission that really set the footwork for me to go on a mission as well.

Elizabeth Carey: And then let's see, some hobbies. I love hiking so much. I just love being out outside. I love the breath of fresh air. I go a little stir crazy if I'm cooped up inside for too long. , That's a bit about me in a nutshell.

Justin Barton: I love it. You said you served in upstate New York. What was the actual mission called and what dates did you serve

Elizabeth Carey: The New York Syracuse Mission and I was there from April, 2023 to November, 2024.

Justin Barton: So Elizabeth, you mentioned that you are In a Navy family. So that typically means you did a lot of moving around as a kid. What were some of the places that you lived in and that had a big impact on who you have become so far in your life?

Elizabeth Carey: Good question.

Elizabeth Carey: I was in San Diego for the majority of my life. And I would say that had the biggest impact especially when it came to high school. I was very blessed in the aspect that I had all of high school in one [00:02:00] location really made a difference, especially when it came to seminary to know that I was growing with the same youth.

Elizabeth Carey: And so it was very easy to connect with my seminary teachers and my peers as we all developed our testimonies of Jesus Christ and the gospel.

Justin Barton: Talk to me a little bit about your experience with seminary. Where you lived, was it release time, was it early morning

Elizabeth Carey: yeah. So first of all, I love seminary. I was so enthusiastic. I would get up just after five every morning. So it was early morning seminary so that I could go in and actually talk with a couple of my teachers because I saw the value in their insight and their testimonies.

Elizabeth Carey: In fact, my, one of my favorite quotes ever is from sister, gosh, she was one of my, one of my instructors, and she's I really wish I could just tear you open and stuff, my testimony inside you and so you back up. But that's very intrusive and that's not how God does it. And that was just important for me because it showed. I needed to take control of my own testimony. I needed to put in the work. I couldn't just rely on someone else's testimony as strong and as bright as they were. I had to do the [00:03:00] work. And that really set the steps for the other people that I interacted with, knowing that I could have a very strong testimony, but I couldn't do the work for them, I could only show them the way they had to make the choices themselves.

Justin Barton: So how did you gain that testimony that she wishes she could stuff inside of you? What was that process like in your life?

Elizabeth Carey: Consistent effort. I like to say that I've been blessed with the testimony of faith. I can easily just look at the gospel and I'm like, yeah, of course that makes sense. I can easily trace it back to the love of God or the atonement in Jesus Christ.

Elizabeth Carey: It's not hard to believe something when I already know that it's founded by servants of God who have been called and set apart to teach the world of the gospel. And so then it was just the small and simple things. Reading my scriptures talking to other people who had very strong testimonies going to church every single Sunday.

Elizabeth Carey: I was actually a very, a slow learner, when it came to actually understanding the fundamental truths of the gospel. But the consistency of it drums it into me [00:04:00] that, oh yeah, this is actually true and this is what I want for the rest of my life.

Justin Barton: So you mentioned your slow learner when it comes to understanding the fundamentals, the foundational principles of the gospel, what are some of those fundamentals or foundational principles that it took you a while to learn that you now feel you're a fairly solid ground with,

Elizabeth Carey: Actually like the Book of Mormon which is crucial as you're a missionary, right?

Elizabeth Carey: Because that's the key scripture that you're using, you're utilizing and helping people develop their own testimonies of, I understood that the Book of Mormon was true, but I didn't quite understand how the principles that were taught in it, the doctrine applied to me personally. I didn't quite understand what the atonement of Jesus Christ was and how I could utilize its enabling power in my life.

Elizabeth Carey: It took my own experience. It took my own life's journey for me to actually understand like, oh this holy writing wasn't for the people. Back in that time, it wasn't for the people in ancient America. They didn't get these scriptures. They didn't read it themselves.

Elizabeth Carey: It was for me, it was for the people that I'm associating with now. And [00:05:00] it took time to understand that someone could easily just yak at me and tell me that, but actually believing it and actually applying it took time and it took experience. Do

Elizabeth Carey: Do

Justin Barton: you mind sharing one of those experiences that may be pivotal in you going, oh yeah, this really was written for me for my time and not for those people that lived, 2000 years ago?

Elizabeth Carey: Yeah. Actually I'll just share one of my favorite scriptures. 'cause it was one of the scriptures where it was just like, wow, god loves his children so much. It's in Mosiah chapter 14. It's verses four through five. It says, surely he has born our griefs and carried our sorrows. Yet we did esteem stricken smitten of God inflicted.

Elizabeth Carey: But he was wounded for arc transgressions. He was bruised for our inequities. The chastisement of our peace was upon him, and with his stripes, we are healed very clearly. That's about the atonement of Jesus Christ right off the bat. But it just went like right over my head for the longest time.

Elizabeth Carey: Until I was actually out on my mission and I was really struggling in this particular companionship and I was like, heavenly father, I don't know what I'm supposed to do [00:06:00] here. I think I'm doing everything that I'm supposed to be doing. Why can't I just get along with this companion? Why can't we just, buckle down, do the work?

Elizabeth Carey: There was this one particular day, I don't remember exactly the circumstances, but I was reading the scripture again and very clearly the spirit was like. Put your name in place of the ours and the we's. Put an I instead make it more personal. And so it turned into surely has borne my griefs and carried my sorrows.

Elizabeth Carey: Yet I did esteem tric and of God and afflicted, but he was wounded for my transgressions. He was bruised for my iniquities. The chastisement of my peace was upon him, and with his stripes, I am healed. And it was making it that much more personal that, that did it. Understanding it's not the Wes and the ours or the uses or anything like that.

Elizabeth Carey: It was me and I, and my father was looking at me. He saw me as, I was the one, he was ministering to the one, and I was the one in that moment.

Justin Barton: Such a powerful eye-opening experience. [00:07:00] And you grew up, like you said, in a fairly large family where it's the we and the us. How does that shift to the I and the me actually maybe even strengthen the we and the US as it becomes about me?

Elizabeth Carey: Yeah, you're absolutely correct. Growing up in a large family, it was very much, I we're unified here, we're gonna work as a unit. When it came to your personal opinion you tried your best to conform it to the group so that everyone could be harmonious and working together.

Elizabeth Carey: And so it took time to understand the value in being a single person. So understanding just the value behind God, loving every single one of his individual children, understanding that he loves me personally and that one of my favorite phrases is heaven is not heaven if we are alone.

Elizabeth Carey: And so it's a collection of all these individuals, every single unique person, every single one of us that God loves, that makes this entire unit that's beautiful and loving. , It's very two-way street. [00:08:00] You have to have the individuals to have the group and I wouldn't have it any other way.

Justin Barton: Yeah. So now let's take that from the big family to that little companionship that you were really struggling with. How did this realization of, hey. This is about me. How did that help your companionship at that point? Were things healed at that point or did they get better at that point because of a perspective change on your part?

Elizabeth Carey: Some perspective change on my part did help. Was the entire companionship healed? No. Because it does take, two to tango. You both individuals have to be in agreement and working together. But I was more at peace. So that allowed a little more opportunity for the spirit to teach me and to teach my campaign especially as I did my best to be a little more humble and a little more teachable.

Elizabeth Carey: . And in her journey as a missionary, she also had the same lessons where she learned humility and how to work better with her companion over time. And so it was overall just a very rewarding experience. Even though it might have not have been healed [00:09:00] right in that moment, it takes effort.

Elizabeth Carey: It still takes effort.

Justin Barton: So later in your mission, maybe you came back together and went maybe a little bit of an amends, how did that feel to make that right? Even if it didn't happen in the time you were together?

Elizabeth Carey: Making it right was amazing. That's a very underappreciated word, but it was so wholesome. To know that, we can move past some of the struggles that we had and we can realize, you know what, I was a little thickheaded. You were a little thickheaded. But that's part of mortality.

Elizabeth Carey: That's part of the experience that we get to go through is growing from that, moving past that and understanding the new value that we have in our relationship as past companions

Justin Barton: Awesome. I love that experience and thanks for , taking that little tangent there, but I think it was a really powerful tangent.

Justin Barton: So Elizabeth, as you look back at your life, you said that your older sister set the example of se serving a mission. How old were you when that happened? And I. Was that basically the only reason you decided to serve a mission? Hey, my sister [00:10:00] did it. I'm gonna follow her in her footsteps.

No.

Elizabeth Carey: Actually far from it, there's a lot deeper story in there. So when my sister served her mission, she went at 19 20. And then I was 17, 17 and 18. That provided me that the confidence that, okay, my older sister could do it, surely I can survive it as well. That kind of thing. Because she especially also had a very hard mission.

Elizabeth Carey: There were a couple of times where we were like, okay, are you gonna be coming home early? Simply because of different challenges. But she stayed out and she trusted in God, and that showed me like, okay, if she's able to do it, I can also do it. I can also trust and have that faith. But I had not always planned to serve a mission.

Elizabeth Carey: If anything, when I was in primary, I was like, I'm so thankful I'm a girl. I don't have that obligation on my shoulders. I don't have to go. But then I received my patriarchal blessing at the age of 15. And very clearly God stated you are going to delight and serve a full-time mission. I'm like you can't tell God no.

Elizabeth Carey: So it immediately, as soon as that blessing was pronounced, I was like, okay, I'm going. I don't know when, but. I'm gonna go. And so it was [00:11:00] very much an instantaneous change of mindset, but it was a blessing.

Justin Barton: That's really cool. Was there anything else that you had an aha moment from your patriarchal blessing that just illuminated the path ahead just a little bit more?

Elizabeth Carey: Let me think about that. That's a deep question.

Elizabeth Carey: Just the emphasis of growth and mortality and that there are experiences to be had, and those experiences can only come by making very deliberate choices. It's not just gonna stumble into you have to choose it yourself. And so that also played a major part in the decision to go on a mission.

Elizabeth Carey: 'cause I'm like it's my choice. God's not gonna force it on me, and it's an invaluable experience. I can't have it any other way, and I only have one opportunity to go. And so that was one of the crucial factors in making the decision.

Justin Barton: Yeah. So from what little we've talked about here in the last 15, 20 minutes, that's three times that you've referenced.

Justin Barton: I have to make the choice myself. It can't be somebody else that gives me my testimony. Like your seminary teacher said, it can't [00:12:00] be somebody else that decides to serve a mission, like you said. And your patriarchal blessing also said you gotta make choices, why do you think that's such a powerful theme in your life, at least in this interaction that you and I have had?

Elizabeth Carey: One of the major themes of my mission was agency. The agency is the people that I was teaching with my companion my own agency as a missionary and as a disciple of Jesus Christ. So just reflecting on the principle of the agency, that is the greatest gift that God has ever given us as his children, is the ability to make choices.

Elizabeth Carey: And that has actually strengthened my own testimony of God's purpose for his children. And so my purpose, and it's the fact that he doesn't want us to be robotic at all. He doesn't want to be the puppeteer and us as puppets. He wants us. To learn and grow for ourselves and to learn the value that comes with that.

Elizabeth Carey: And especially for this interaction with you Elder Barton, where we're discussing my mission in post terms [00:13:00] and understanding that the rest of my life trajectory is forever altered because of the choice that I made to go and serve a mission. The trajectory of. Future people that I will interact with.

Elizabeth Carey: My future family is forever changed because I decided to choose for myself and go on a mission and choose the blessings that were in store because of that. It's . More than impactful.

Justin Barton: Yeah. So you mentioned something there, Elizabeth. You said, God doesn't want us to be robotic.

Justin Barton: Now if I'm looking at members of the church, either from the outside or even from the inside with a cynical eye I think. You got all these rules. Everybody has to follow the same rules. Everybody has to do this. Check check. We appear to be robotic. , How does your experience with agency conflict with that thought that some people may have?

Elizabeth Carey: Okay. It's really funny, actually, I was having to discuss this a little earlier. For an assignment for college, it completely and totally conflicts. God, of course, being God, he is the one who writes the contract. He sets the terms and the conditions. [00:14:00] But it's up to us personally to choose if we're gonna accept those terms or not. If we choose not to, great, we will still be happy with whatever we choose. That's God.

Elizabeth Carey: He's very giving and very loving in that aspect. He's not gonna force us to. Partake of something that we don't want to partake of. And so when it comes to, oh, we have to follow these very exact covenants, we have to follow these very exact ordinances it can seem very constricting when in the reality it's liberating the power that I receive in my life because of the covenants that I have made.

Elizabeth Carey: The oranges that, that I make and partake of every week and or every day is

Elizabeth Carey: so impactful. It's not constricting at all. There's no fence keeping me in. If anything it's allowing me to see wider horizons because I'm able to go so much farther because I'm relying on the power in the arm of God.

Justin Barton: Elizabeth, let's go into your mission now. [00:15:00] How did those concepts of hey, following God's plan is actually liberating? , And the concept of agency, how did you encounter those with people maybe you met with on your mission, whether it be companions, whether it be friends or members that you met with.

Elizabeth Carey: I think we'll start with the other missionaries that I was interacting with. So something I should mention about my mission is I had a change of mission presidents towards the tail end of my mission and I love both of them. Both of 'em are absolutely incredible disciples of Jesus Christ, and they were exactly what I needed at the time.

Elizabeth Carey: My first mission President, president Gentry and his wife, they were very much exact obedience. Exact obedience, brings exact blessings. And we saw that in the mission as we were very obedient to the standards that were given to us. And in and following the commandments.

Elizabeth Carey: And on the flip side, when my second mission president came in, president Coleman he came in with [00:16:00] the. Mindset, you know what the standards are, and you also know that there's a lot of room for you to choose about the spirit of the law. It's up to you what you're going to do. You know what God expects of you.

Elizabeth Carey: You know what you're expecting of yourself. How are you going to act now? And it was a lot of. Conflicts for a lot of missionaries, especially the older missionaries where we were still stuck in this mindset of, no it, it's exactly written down. Follow the letter of the law.

Elizabeth Carey: And with the switch of mission presidency , my mind was open so much more and the minds of the other missionaries were open so much more as we were thinking. Now hold up. Why did God give the standard, . Why was the first presidency inspired to give us this specific standard for us to follow as far as how lessons should be structured, who should be in attendance to these lessons how should we be interacting as missionaries, if there's a conflict, how should we handle that as a companionship?

Elizabeth Carey: And in involving other missionaries as far as leadership, that kind of thing. There was so much more of an open mindset and it [00:17:00] was a struggle to make that adjustment from letter of the law to spirit. The law, but it was very much worth it by the end of it. Because , at least for me personally, I saw the value that God has for his children.

Elizabeth Carey: Where he is here is, here's the commandment. Now what's the spirit of the commandment? What exactly am I asking you to do here?

Justin Barton: All right let's dive into something specific there. And I've had these same awakenings where, okay, what is the purpose of this?

Justin Barton: What's the spirit behind it and what does it really mean? And there seems to be more freedom, but more learning in that also. So gimme an example of a time when you thought the letter of the law was the only way to do it and the spirit. Stepped in and said, Hey, have you ever seen it this way?

Elizabeth Carey: Okay.

Elizabeth Carey: So I was actually a trainer at this point, so you can imagine like the extra mantle that was placed on my shoulders of Hey, I need to be like a really good example for my trainee here so that they're equipped to do the work once I'm not here.

Elizabeth Carey: We were at a , a service opportunity, and one of the rules is we're not supposed to be on all terrain vehicles. [00:18:00] Okay. I disregarded that rule. Like as soon as I heard that, I'm like, nah, okay. The rule is, no, I shouldn't be doing this. I shouldn't get on that a TV. But we needed to drive down to get to a bridge so that we could work on repairing this bridge.

Elizabeth Carey: That was the project. And without a second thought, I just got on the A TV, my campaign got right on with me, and we drove down to the bridge. And I remember after the experience, . I was like, I might, oh my word. I feel so guilty about this. I totally just disregarded a very pinpoint rule.

Elizabeth Carey: It's explicitly stated not to do this. And. I was so guilty about it., I called my mission president. I'm like, Hey, I am struggling with this. And he's okay. In the moment of that, did you feel bad about it? I'm like, no, absolutely not. There was a service project and the gentleman needed our help.

Elizabeth Carey: I didn't see any issue with this whatsoever, and it was safe. And he is then you're good. I'm like, what? That's it. Like surely there should be some sort of consequence. Come on what's going on here? And he is no, you made a judgment that was sound. [00:19:00] Now granted, don't go spreading of this around to other missionaries.

Elizabeth Carey: We don't want missionaries just going on and writing ATVs on whim here. But in that moment you didn't feel guilty and you made a sound judgment. It doesn't matter what the hard written letter was. The spirit of the law was there was someone that needed to be helped and you were there to help them.

Elizabeth Carey: And so that, opened my mind and my companion, my trainee and I we definitely debrief this afterwards. I'm like, okay, to be clear we're not gonna go tell other missionaries that we did this very apostate thing. But just remember that our purpose is to help God's children in every aspect that we can.

Justin Barton: . As you shared that I, the story from the New Testament where Christ healed somebody on the Sabbath day, comes to mind that , the letter of the law was you don't do that, but the spirit is the ox is in the mire. There's something, somebody that needs some help, is it right to do good in this way?

Elizabeth Carey: No pretty much just that, that was just one of many experiences that I could pull from where I'm like, wow, yeah, I'm such a [00:20:00] different missionary based on like letter of the law versus spirit of the law. It was exactly what you've mentioned earlier where I learned so much more because my mind was open to it.

Justin Barton: Love it. , Did you have any other oh, verses of scripture or maybe, ideas or themes that really rang through your mission other than this agency choice that we've talked about that you come back to and you go, that made a difference in who I am today?

Elizabeth Carey: That's a good question. Mosiah 14 was one that I went back to regularly throughout my mission.

Elizabeth Carey: Another one. We've touched on the theme a little bit here with the service. But for my missionary plaque, what was left here at home, I actually put the quote by President Gordon, b Hinkley's, father, forget yourself and go to work. That was very much the theme of my mission where I was like, I am not out here for me.

Elizabeth Carey: Whatever blessings I receive, like of course I'm gonna be a benefactor here, but I'm not out here for me. I am out here for the savior. He has given me so much, how can I not give something back? [00:21:00] And that theme ran very prominently through the entirety of my mission, especially with the other missionaries that I was interacting with as we were learning what lifelong discipleship really was and what that looks like and why we are gonna be lifelong disciples.

Elizabeth Carey: And that was actually another theme that ran through the mission , was lifelong discipleship. What does that look like? And how are we gonna prepare for that now? When we're at such a crucial time in our lives where we could easily be at school, we could easily be partying with friends instead, but we're giving this tithing of our lives, so to speak, to come closer to God and help others come closer to God .

Justin Barton: All right, so teach me, what does lifelong discipleship look like to you today?

Elizabeth Carey: It goes back to the principle of agency. It is a daily choice. Especially for me as a daily choice. Something I haven't touched on was just how hard my testimony was shaken during my mission.

Elizabeth Carey: , There were multiple times where I would get up in the morning, I'm like, heavenly Father, you have to help me get through this day. [00:22:00] Or, I'm not even sure I can get through this day. I'm pretty sure I just need to go home. But realizing that.

Elizabeth Carey: And Jesus Christ really was there every single step of the way through the very thick of it and through the very heart shaking that I was receiving Christ was there through it all. And he made sure that I was able to look back, forget myself and get to work because it was as I forgot myself that I found myself that scripture and the New Testament rings very much true.

Elizabeth Carey: I found myself as. As I loved and served others the way that Christ would.

Justin Barton: Elizabeth I wanna sit here for just a minute. You talked about your testimony being shaken and it was like a big shaking and not just one time. . Do you wanna share anything about any specific instances or things that were shaken that you had to really turn to Christ and just forget yourself in the work.

Elizabeth Carey: Yeah. I think this goes for a number of members of the church, but understanding I. Exactly what our relationship to Jesus Christ is and understanding that he really is just as [00:23:00] real as a person as God is. And sometimes it's vice versa where people are like, yes, of course, Jesus Christ. Like I love him. He's my older brother, he's my savior, he's my protector, all of that.

Elizabeth Carey: But they don't quite know how to develop that in depth relationship with Heavenly Father. And that was something that I struggled with on my mission I knew heavenly father, but I didn't quite know who Jesus Christ was. I didn't understand the relationship where it's through Jesus Christ.

Elizabeth Carey: I have to go through him to reach my heavenly Father. And so not understanding that was really what was causing a lot of shaking because not understanding that principle that. That doctrine of the gospel that left me vulnerable to feel alone and very susceptible to the attacks of the adversary.

Elizabeth Carey: And that was something that I had to learn on my mission was the devil has had centuries to perfect his game. He knows exactly what is gonna get us down. He knows exactly what angle we need to be attacked at, where we're gonna forget everything else that we've learned. All the faith that we've ever had, all the [00:24:00] experiences that we've had.

Elizabeth Carey: And just feel very alone and very much like we can't move forward. And so it took diving into those scriptures again and again, it took me having numerous heartfelt pleads with my heavenly Father be like, Hey, I need to feel closer to Jesus Christ. I need to understand this principle.

Elizabeth Carey: Help me understand, help me know what I don't understand so that . I can feel on solid ground and feel like I actually want to be a lifelong disciple of Jesus Christ and not just throw everything to the wind. And so through those prayers, through my rigorous studies, I was able to find my why, really, why I want to be a lifelong disciple, and why I've come so far through the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Justin Barton: All right. So what is your why? .

Elizabeth Carey: So as far as why I live the gospel of Jesus Christ, why I will continue to be a lifelong disciple of Jesus Christ is because I [00:25:00] love Heavenly Father, and I understand his love for me. That is why it's literally love. And I thought back when I was a teenager, I was like, that is so cheesy.

Elizabeth Carey: Like why do we say that? But it is so true. It's literally the love of God. That's what carries us through. It's the love of God that created the plan of salvation. It's the love of God that created the gospel of Jesus Christ. It's the love of God that gives us the priesthood power in our lives, and that has to be my why.

Justin Barton: So how do you know? Heavenly father loves you. Tell me about an experience you had where you just felt maybe literal arms around you saying, Hey, I'm here. I love you.

Elizabeth Carey: Yeah. Let me see. I'm gonna be very careful in the critique. You know it because it is a very personal experience.

Elizabeth Carey: So it was actually when I was about to receive my patriarchal blessing so I was in preparation for receiving my patal blessing, and I remember just feeling absolutely just ick that day. That's the [00:26:00] only way I can describe it.

Elizabeth Carey: There were just a couple of choices that I was making. I'm like, man, like really? That is such a. Pitiful choice that you just made there. Like why can't you make a better decision here? And so that, that contrast of, ugh this is awful. I don't like this feeling. I don't feel ready, I don't feel prepared , to go and take this really big step and what would amplify my testimony.

Elizabeth Carey: And just the sudden turn where I no longer felt that nastiness, I didn't feel that darkness anymore. I wouldn't necessarily, it was like feeling arms around me. But very much there was this contrast of absolute darkness to absolute joy and the only way that joy can be described as the love of God.

Elizabeth Carey: I knew very much in that instant God cared about Elizabeth Carey. God cared about me personally as his daughter and he would always care. It was just a matter of, okay, am I gonna focus on what the adversary wants me to focus on? Or am I gonna focus on what does God want me to focus on? [00:27:00] And that's continued growth and experience.

Justin Barton: Thank you for sharing that. Beautiful. Elizabeth, is there anything else from your experience as a missionary that you feel is important? It's maybe sitting on your heart and you just wanna share, this is something that I learned

Elizabeth Carey: Trust God, that's literally what it flows down to. Just trust God. Even when it doesn't feel like you're trusting God those tiny little decisions are an action of faith. Faith is such, such an incredible principle that sometimes is overlooked simply because it seems so, so foreigners are out there sometimes.

Elizabeth Carey: But it's so true where God just wants us to act. Sometimes it's just one step forward and that's all we can give. But it's that, that principle of bringing the loaves and the fishes, God doesn't require us to perform the actual miracle. He just wants us to bring what [00:28:00] we can. And sometimes all that we can bring is something very simple, very small.

Elizabeth Carey: It's just us saying, okay, I can pray one time, or I can read this one scripture, or I can talk to this one person. How many times that, that was the theme of my vision where I'm like, okay, only father, I can talk to this one person, and that one person turned into two and that two turned into four and eight, and so on and so forth.

Elizabeth Carey: But just trusting God and bringing that loaf for that fish, whatever it is that you have, he can make it work.

Justin Barton: , So I'm, I want to go back. Tie a couple of things together here. You talked about how seminary was so important to you. You showed up early , to talk to your teachers and, get some light from them while you served your mission.

Justin Barton: It was an everyday thing, every day trying to feed off the light of the Lord and of the gospel every day. You've now been home about three months, right? How do you continue to try and. Get that light now that you're home, you aren't wearing the badge, you aren't under the [00:29:00] expectation that every day I'm gonna be in the gospel every day.

Justin Barton: I don't go to seminary five days a week, or whatever that looks like. How do you do that now?

Elizabeth Carey: It's still a daily choice. Absolutely. Am I receiving extra impressions every single second of every single day? Like I wasn't the missionary? No. But the underlying principle of agency is still there, where I have to choose every single day.

Elizabeth Carey: Henly father, what do you need me to accomplish today? What do you need me to do? Who do you need me to reach out to? Who do you need me to see? How do you need me to grow? It's those kinds of questions and continue to make that effort of involving Henly father in my life personally, because as I do that I can also be involved in the lives of this other children.

Elizabeth Carey: I can be that, that answered prayer. And , I think the bigger point especially is attending the temple. I was very blessed as a missionary in the New York Syracuse Mission where the temple was in my mission and we had the opportunity to go once every six months. I didn't [00:30:00] understand or appreciate that until I came back home and.

Elizabeth Carey: The temple is literally like just a couple minutes away from me, and I had the impression soon after getting home, you need to be in the temple. You need to be a worker. And so following those impressions sometimes they're gonna be bigger, sometimes they're gonna be smaller. But realizing and taking every opportunity that I can to be closer to Heavenly Father and to continue to do his work the work isn't just limited to the full-time missionaries that are set apart.

Elizabeth Carey: I definitely believe President Kimball was right where he emphasized the importance of every member missionary and what that looks like. That is every member, a lifelong disciple of Jesus Christ, doing everything that they can to follow the impressions that they receive.

Justin Barton: All right, so as we start wrapping this up this project is called Can You Feel So Now? It's based on Alma chapter five verse 26, and that verse reads, and now I behold, I say unto you, if you have experienced a change of heart, if you have felt to sing the song of [00:31:00] redeeming love, I would ask, can you feel so now? So I'd like to ask just a couple of questions around this verse of scripture.

Justin Barton: Elizabeth, what has that. Change of heart that you've experienced look like,

Elizabeth Carey: first of all, there were so many missionaries that I interacted with where that was their scripture that they focused on their entire mission on was Can You Feel. So now and I relied heavily on that scripture for a number of teaching opportunities with friends and other people that we interacted with as missionaries.

Elizabeth Carey: And I can honestly say that by choosing lifelong discipleship every single day, I can feel so now, it is impossible to not feel the light of Christ and the love of God when I'm not thinking about him. So as I make that conscious decision as everyone else makes that conscious decision, I can honestly say.

Elizabeth Carey: I can, and we can feel so now.

Justin Barton: Love that. What does it mean to sing the song of redeeming love? What does that look like to you in your life?

Elizabeth Carey: That's a really good question. [00:32:00] I'm the kind of person where I like to break things down. Singing, that's a choice. Going back to that theme of agency again that's a deliberate action that you can take. Redeeming redemption, being saved, moving forward, and then of course of love.

Elizabeth Carey: Going back to , that first principle and that why that I have, why do I do it? Why do I continue to do it? It's because of love. So singing the Song of Redeeming Love, that is something very personal to me. It's something that I have to choose to see that Jesus Christ has already performed his sacrifice.

Elizabeth Carey: It's eternal. It's something that is always going to be there as long as I make that deliberate choice to see it and to receive it. That is something that I can do every single day, and that's something that every person can do every single day as they choose to do it, and as they choose to see the love that Heavenly Father had for his children through the redemption of Jesus Christ.

Justin Barton: Thank you for sharing that. And you've talked a little bit about, , today [00:33:00] you feel so now let's jump in a time machine. Let's go ahead. Some point in the future where it's one of those days, like you mentioned on your mission, you woke up in the morning, you're like I'm not gonna make it through today.

Justin Barton: I'm not feeling it right now. It's not there. Why don't you sit across the table from that future self of yours? Give yourself a pep talk.

I hope it'd be a little kinder than just slapping myself across the face, being like, Hey, get yourself together

remember the experiences that you've had. I am a very big journaler. I've journaled so many experiences and not just the little facts of, oh yeah, we talked to this person about this gospel principle, that kind of thing, but how I felt and how I changed and what I thought. And so remember those experiences because those were the moments where I sang the song of redeeming love.

Elizabeth Carey: Those were the experiences that I felt. So then if I felt so, then I can feel so now. That's what I would say.

Justin Barton: Love it. I'm gonna ask another [00:34:00] question. I usually wrap up right about here. . But you talked about journaling and the importance of journaling. Share a little bit about how journaling has saved you in your life.

Elizabeth Carey: That's a very intuitive question. I like it. For me, journaling is honestly very therapeutic. Especially with a world where I'm bombarded by a bunch of ideas and opinions, and I'm like, I don't know what to do. I don't know what to think. I'm supposed to follow Jesus Christ. I'm supposed to be able to just follow the very still small voice of the spirit.

Elizabeth Carey: How in the world am I supposed to do that? And journaling provides the atmosphere that I need to just dial everything else back. And focus on the impressions that I receive from the Holy Ghost. And as I do that, I can think through the experiences that I've had. I can't tell you the number of times I've written down experiences.

Elizabeth Carey: And then rewrite them and rewrite them because I remember different details. I remember [00:35:00] things that helped me in those more difficult moments where I'm struggling. And exactly as you said has definitely saved me in numerous capacities where I was forgetting and it helped me remember the goodness of God.

Justin Barton: I'm so glad that I felt that impression to dive deeper on that. Thank you for sharing that. I think that's very helpful for me and I think it's very helpful for you too at some point listening to your own words there and to somebody else. So as we close out, are you willing to bear testimony of whatever gospel principle is on your heart right now?

Elizabeth Carey: Yeah, I , would love to, the difference between believe and now are so very sharp very clear. There's a difference between believing something to be true and knowing with assurity that it's fact. And I can honestly say that I know HEavenly father as my God. I can honestly say that he loves.

Elizabeth Carey: Every single one of his children, he knows every single one of them by [00:36:00] name, just the same as he knew Joseph Smith by name. I know that he answered one 14 year old's plea. It's very simple question because he loved him, and I know that Heavenly father has answered so many of my questions and has brought me relief so many times.

Elizabeth Carey: I know that it's the same for every single person on this planet who has ever lived and ever will live. It's the same principle. I know that God wants us to choose for ourselves to be lifelong disciples to Jesus Christ. Heavenly Father is just as real as, as me and you, and

Elizabeth Carey: It's up to us , to develop and strengthen that relationship. It's not something that he's gonna force on us it's something that we have to choose every single day to do, to choose to have faith, to choose, to look for and show love for him. 'cause he gives it so readily. And I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ.

Elizabeth Carey: Amen. [00:37:00]

Justin Barton: Amen. Amen. Thank you so much, Elizabeth. This has been a very powerful and meaningful conversation for me.

Elizabeth Carey: It has. Thank you so much for the opportunity to. Do this recording. It was great.